do you thoroughly wipe your ass

#2
No, I wash an people who wipe are fuckin nasty...i mean come on when you wipe 'shit' off your ass all your doin is smugin that shit all over your ass which means you be stinkin of shit? Right?
 

TheCat

Well-Known Member
#9
fact: you are never too old for baby wipes

whenever i cant get baby wipes i use my hand. that shit comes right off. just moisten your hand and do a karate chop in ya ass crack. you will be left humbled after each bowel evacuation.

LMAO!!:lol:

are you sure you dont use your hand like a SAW and saw through your asshole?
 

S. Fourteen

Well-Known Member
#12
I will, especially when they call 911 because there isn't any ketchup on their burger.
Didn't you learn anything from S O F I's lackluster ketchup reference?

Do you put sugar on popcorn? No you don't and you probably live in a trailer home if you do.

---

Okay, lets picture a sheet of seaweed with rice on it.

Picturing it? OKay, ok.

Should I slap some meat and cheese on there and call it a day? HELL NO!

First - cucumber. Plenty of juice, great texture (make sure to cut off the gooey seedy part), great neutralizer and the firmness of it gives the roll a nice foundation.

Second - lets try some pickled burdock. even more crunchy with a great lasting flavor. gives nice color and texture.

Third - lets go for some good ol' crab meat. imitation will do as long as you mix mayo or something like that to give it some kick.

Fourth - I'm still stuck on the Thrid - fake crab meat can be very boring - OH I KNOW! - tiny slices of lemon will expand freshness in your mouth!

Fifth - Still not a man's roll. Let's slap some raw salmon on this bad boy. Nice and oily with what I like to describe as Earthy taste. (If you didn't use mayo for the crab - this might be a good time to add mayo.) Mix mayo with some sriracha sauce. Of course plain salmon can go a long ways but this Doggy's roll and I want it to be a man's roll.

Sixth - Stopping here would be plain laziness. So, we sprinkle a bit of Ao Nori - seaweed shavings. Not the same as the seaweed on the outside - fuller taste that I think will go well with crab.

Now roll that shit up tight so it doesn't fall apart.

Seventh - Not done yet! We need a good presentation on the outside!

Avocado slices and cooked eel slices lined up diagonally to give a brown and green candy cane-like appearance. Now, usually, I'd add heart shaped leaves of radish sprouts on top of each piece but Doggy doesn't have a vagina and I'm not trying to get his number, so forget the leaves.

OH I KNOW!!! LETS TAKE A GIANT KETCHUP SHIT ON THIS ROLL I JUST MADE FOR YOU!!! FORGET THE LAYERS AND LAYERS OF FLVORS BECAUSE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY TOO GOOD FOR IT. JUST SMOTHER IT IN KETCHUP FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! COCK SUCK BITCH LOVE.

NOW EAT YOUR PILE OF KETCHUP SHIT AND WIPE THAT ASS CLEAN!

THE END
--

Doggy, I am full heartedly disappointed that you have not learned from my past posts.
 

S O F I

Administrator
Staff member
#17
Didn't you learn anything from S O F I's lackluster ketchup reference?
Explaining humor is lame, but the ketchup-reference was a good one...it was far-reaching, encompassed several of your posts. But, meh. Plus, a one-line demand-response to a hater thread that you thought would flourish and lead to reps in your CP? Priceless.
 
#18
I have been pooping blood lately. What could it mean? I don't think it's because of the gay anal last night either. :(

It goes with the territory. There are blood vessels all over the digestive tract to absorb all the goodness from food into the bloodstream. There are blood vessels round the shpinter thats why people get piles.


Yes I wipe my ass, and if I had a bday I would wash it afterwards as well. happy now?
 

Prize Gotti

Boots N Cats
Staff member
#20
It goes with the territory. There are blood vessels all over the digestive tract to absorb all the goodness from food into the bloodstream. There are blood vessels round the shpinter thats why people get piles.


Yes I wipe my ass, and if I had a bday I would wash it afterwards as well. happy now?
so does mean you dont have a birthday? and if you did, it would be the only time you'd wash your ass?
 

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