stressin' out

[Florida123]

i've been having a real rough stretch lately, so i thought i'd share

school is driving me nuts. i am in my second year at uni, and classes are crazy difficult. i'm not a rhodes scholar by any means, but i have been working my ass off just to stay around the b to b+ range. if i don't do well on finals, (next 2 weeks) my average will drop even lower. i'm not really driven by grades, but i have to maintain a B average to keep my scholarship. i'm taking difficult classes, but that doesn't matter to the financial aid office.

not to mention that, people are getting on my nerves. i'm having girl problems in the sense that i just can't seem to find a girl that i can just be myself around. it seems like everyone is so fake, and i'm not like that. i'm not all about the glitz and glamour, and being seen and shit. that's not really the big problem though.

my roommate is really pissing me off. he has failed out of two classes this semester, so he's only taking 3, of which he never goes to. all day everyday, he drinks and smokes weed (and does other shit for all i know). it's very distracting especially when you are trying to study. and he has no courtesy, so he won't leave the room ever, nor will his fucked up friend who is just like him. i have blown up on him many times, but it just doesn't sink in, probably because he is fucked up all the time. he truly is in a different world.

the reason why that is bothering me so much is because he was my best friend all throughout grade school and high school. we go back a long way, and we ended up at the same college. he was fine last year, still kinda annoying in a sense, but tolerable. but this is ridiculous. i can literally see him ruining his life before my eyes, and there is nothing i can do about it.

i have so much to worry about myself and this is just another issue to deal with. i normally would be looking forward to a relaxing summer, but i just accepted a job at a marketing firm so i will have that to learn all summer. i will be working 40 hours a week with that, and during the weekend i will continue my job at eckerd's pharmacy.

i'm sorry for ranting, but it's not like i can tell my roommate...

if anyone has advice or anything that would be much appreciated cause i've really had just about all i can take.

 

[imported_MAKaveli_10]

Yo, your roommate is fucking you and himself up real bad. You gotta say it to his face, that if he doesn't smarting up hes gonna be working at burger king flipping burgers his whole life. Also, for your class stress, I suggest that you take long bathes and read a good book. It should calm you down. Or play video games. Go purchase a psp and play it when your stressed out. Playing video games always kills the stress. Also, when your roommate is fucked up, study at the library. Thats some advice.

 

[Jokerman]

The only thing i can tell you is don't stress over your friend. He's responsible for himself and his own choices. If it's hard to study with him there, go study at the library or somewhere else. And maybe put the relationships with girls on hold for a while

 

[Florida123]

jokerman, i know he's responsible for his own actions, but this is/was my best friend we're talking about here. it's not in my nature to just let him freefall.

but i guess you're right because maybe he needs to hit the bottom before it sinks in.

 

[Ghetto_Ghost]

*deleted*

 

[Maverick-old-account]

hes a male

 

[Ghetto_Ghost]

^ oops.
i misread something
nvm what i said

 

[Upper-CUT]

Cardella-leaving my close friends gave me a whole new outlook on life. It was the best thing I have ever done as far as my whole academic career goes. My friends were exactly like yours. They never study, always party and never took their life seriously. I am in 3rd year uni and man what can I say? I look back right now and think to myself that it was the best thing I could have done with my life.

Sometimes you have to make sacrifices. I realize that he is your good friend but if you want to succeed and if he is really your true friend you should set up some guildlines with him. Have a serious talk with him when he is sober. Confront him about your feelings and problems regarding your future. If he really cares about you then he would try at least not to effect your studying activities like constantly bringing people over which might effect your precious sleeping time and whatnot.

If I were you I would leave that place and find a new roommate. You guys can still keep in touch and all. Sure, my friends and I are not as close as we should be but you know what? There was a time when I was living with them that I wanted to quit studying and I did not beleive in myself because of all the distractions of partying and smoking weed and shit. I made excuses for everything. I blamed everyone for my problems except myself. When I look back now I noticed that not only did I surpass everyone's expectations but it just makes me feel happier that I made that tough decision. I just passed all my courses with straight Bs and As. Studying and tests are easy when you work hard and have a positive attitude. Back then I though it was impossible.

If you can't or don't want to leave your roomie because of financial or social reasons then what I suggest you do is stay in school everyday. Try to get all your work done at school before you head home. Sure it is very boring and tedious but once you have finished them there is no greater feeling. Try to study 3 to 4 hours a day on a subject...everyday. Do not cram, EVER. You will just stress yourself for no reason and wouldn't perform as well during an exam.

And as for the girl thing, FORGET THEM FOR NOW. Deal with you life first. Try to set everything straight with your studies. The time will come for girlfriends and parties once you have tasted success. For now, you already have alot to deal with and a girl in your life would just occupy your limited time.

Hang in there bro. I have been there myself and I understand what you are going through. The good news is that all of these problems can be fixed and there is a solution for everything. Don't sweat it too much just do what you gotta do. Stay strong and everyhting will turn out right for you once you plan your future and set goals to accomplish them. You have got to want to achieve these goals for them to happen. If you keep saying that I can't get this grade or that grade then you really won't get it. You got to try harder when the situation calls for it. After it is all said and done, you will finish school fast and have a great future and you will thank yourself for it. Think short-term now. What do you have to do or change right now to perform better at school?

Remember that "a man who fails to plan, plans to fail"-Malcolm X

Don't follow in your friend's footsteps. Do your thing even if it means jeoperdizing your relationships with your friends. Your friends aren't the ones who are going to write your exams.

Peace bro. Good luck. I hope you do well on those exams

 

[Ay-G]

try going to a librairy to study if your roomates pissing you off.

 

[The.Menace]

keep ya head up.

 

[Florida123]

Cardella-leaving my close friends gave me a whole new outlook on life. It was the best thing I have ever done as far as my whole academic career goes. My friends were exactly like yours. They never study, always party and never took their life seriously. I am in 3rd year uni and man what can I say? I look back right now and think to myself that it was the best thing I could have done with my life.

Sometimes you have to make sacrifices. I realize that he is your good friend but if you want to succeed and if he is really your true friend you should set up some guildlines with him. Have a serious talk with him when he is sober. Confront him about your feelings and problems regarding your future. If he really cares about you then he would try at least not to effect your studying activities like constantly bringing people over which might effect your precious sleeping time and whatnot.

If I were you I would leave that place and find a new roommate. You guys can still keep in touch and all. Sure, my friends and I are not as close as we should be but you know what? There was a time when I was living with them that I wanted to quit studying and I did not beleive in myself because of all the distractions of partying and smoking weed and shit. I made excuses for everything. I blamed everyone for my problems except myself. When I look back now I noticed that not only did I surpass everyone's expectations but it just makes me feel happier that I made that tough decision. I just passed all my courses with straight Bs and As. Studying and tests are easy when you work hard and have a positive attitude. Back then I though it was impossible.

If you can't or don't want to leave your roomie because of financial or social reasons then what I suggest you do is stay in school everyday. Try to get all your work done at school before you head home. Sure it is very boring and tedious but once you have finished them there is no greater feeling. Try to study 3 to 4 hours a day on a subject...everyday. Do not cram, EVER. You will just stress yourself for no reason and wouldn't perform as well during an exam.

And as for the girl thing, FORGET THEM FOR NOW. Deal with you life first. Try to set everything straight with your studies. The time will come for girlfriends and parties once you have tasted success. For now, you already have alot to deal with and a girl in your life would just occupy your limited time.

Hang in there bro. I have been there myself and I understand what you are going through. The good news is that all of these problems can be fixed and there is a solution for everything. Don't sweat it too much just do what you gotta do. Stay strong and everyhting will turn out right for you once you plan your future and set goals to accomplish them. You have got to want to achieve these goals for them to happen. If you keep saying that I can't get this grade or that grade then you really won't get it. You got to try harder when the situation calls for it. After it is all said and done, you will finish school fast and have a great future and you will thank yourself for it. Think short-term now. What do you have to do or change right now to perform better at school?

Remember that "a man who fails to plan, plans to fail"-Malcolm X

Don't follow in your friend's footsteps. Do your thing even if it means jeoperdizing your relationships with your friends. Your friends aren't the ones who are going to write your exams.

Peace bro. Good luck. I hope you do well on those exams

thanks, man...one of the nicest things anyone has ever written for me.

i will follow your advice and i think it will be for the best.

and everyone else that responded, thanks for the encouraging comments.