Is having 2 parents important?

[Shadows]

I want to know your opinion on how having 2 parents or 1.....possibly even none effects peoples lives.

I grew up with just my mom b/c my pops thought drugs and beer where the way to go when i was about a few months old.

I always said i wasn't affected by not having my dad but people would say that I wasn't affected b/c my step dad was always around.
True but not true. I always felt he treated his kids better even though the actions were a little small.

I do remember being affected by my real dad not being around but it's b/c i would have dreams about a man that was always my dad and i never had a picture on his face, he was always faceless.

Anyway, the reason I bring this up is b/c I meet a few people who are dadless and step fatherless (both male and female) and they do okay.....but then I meet some others that have a fucked up life and they say it's b/c they were fatherless or motherless.

Do you believe it is important to have 2 parents? If so, do you think it is more dramatic if say a son is fatherless more than a son is motherless...etc?

Let the debate begin.

 

[Casey]

My mother died when I was barely 5 years old and the lack of a mother has affected me more than anything else in my life.

I feel there are many things and situations where I don't know what to do or how to react because I never learned how or was shown by anyone, things that everyone else would know. The result is that in some relationships I've been in, the woman has had to "mother" me in some respects, so to speak, not out of want but out of necessity. It's caused problems but I think I've learned a lot and am a better person now for it.

 

[The.Menace]

of course it affects you and I think it's important 2 have two parents. But of course, I know, life isn't always that way.

 

[Killuminatii 71]

Both parents are important since your mom teaches you the role of the woman in a family, and your father teaches you the role of a man in a family.

I think 2pac said it best when he said "A woman can't teach you how to be a man."

So, yes, i think it's important to have both parental figures in one's life as much as possible. I hear kids everywhere saying "i hate my mom, i wish she would die" and vice versa, but the reality of it is that they are kids who don't know right from wrong, and that hopefully will learn to appreciate their parents in one way or another.

Sorry to hear about your guys' situation. I'm sure it's pretty hard for a few of you to have to live your lives without a mother/father in your lives. My dad's father died when he was about 4-5 years old, and his mother died when he was 15, and it's affected him a lot. Fortunately for me, i still have both of my parents and i hope i can keep them around for as long as possible. Losing a parent would be a big blow to anyone.

But, there are always the cowards who don't want to take on the responsibility of being a responsible father/mother. I say, if they walk out of your life (especially before you knew them), who needs a father/mother like that anyway?

Peace

 

[_carmi]

I think the best is to have both parents. However life is a bitch so it doesn't happen to everybody.

I had two parents, I think I turned out okay. My bf only had his mother raising him and he turned out great. I guess it depends on how that single parent raises you and also on how you, the kid with a single parent, react to this. Each kid has different needs, some need more guidance than others from both parents but one missing makes them miss out while some don't miss out.

 

[Kadafi Son]

My story is the same as Shadow's, except my stepfathers came & went, leavin scars. But I think it is very important to have 2 parent, especially if your planning to have kids. You can do without, like I have, and come out decent in your 20's, but bitterness, confusion and pain play a factor in your coming of age in regards of how to deal with yourself, emotionally, socially and mentally. Itz kinda hard to explain, but...everybodys different. Some situations on both parts have different outcomes.

 

[Duke]

I was raised by wolves and I turned out fine.

 

[Preach]

What you just put in your post there is what all those teenage girls failed to realize, Shadows. You are affected in those subtle ways that only come to the surface years later.

 

[Jokerman]

I was raised by wolves and I turned out fine.

Sure, but both your wolf parents were there. (Even if they were gay wolves.)

 

[masta247]

Personally I noticed that most people who were raised by their fathers only are dicks. Seriously.

I was raised only by my mother. I used to look for role models when I was little but after all I'm happy about the way I was raised. I also appreciate my mother more and feel like I have more respect for women.

 

[Bender]

how else could you be without having two parents :blink:

 

[Da_Funk]

how else could you be without having two parents :blink:

Yeshua's got the jokes today!

 

[Duke]

Sure, but both your wolf parents were there. (Even if they were gay wolves.)

Actually, I had about 7 wolf parents.

 

[Freedom Froggy]

plain and simply put.. yes

 

[S O F I]

Answering this question largely depends on the difference between being raised by one parent or both (leaving out the fact that some people are raised without both). It's hard to determine the significance of the difference, though. We can't really know for sure because it's hard for us to determine how different we would be if we were raised by both or weren't. We can look at ourselves and think "Hey I have issues with relationships" or " hey I don't know how to tie a knot and start a campfire" so I'll blame it on my father's lack of presence but it might not be particularly accurate. I think kids do turn out different, but again, we don't know if the difference matters.

 

[Shadows]

^good point. But using your example of "hey, i have issues with relationships," can also be applied to people who have both parents that are just bad in relationships too.

 

[SicC]

I believe its very important to have 2 parents.

pz

 

[S O F I]

^good point. But using your example of "hey, i have issues with relationships," can also be applied to people who have both parents that are just bad in relationships too.

Yep, which I think further proves my point.

 

[Flipmo]

My parents are divorced, and I am not close with my father. It was very normal for me to not see him for a few years for whatever reason, then he'd just gimme a call out of the blue. If you want my personal opinion about it all. It's important to have 2 parents. There have been days where I wished my parents were together.
I generally grew looking up to my grandfather who was more of a father figure to me than my real father. He died 3 years ago, so just when I felt I could use his words of wisdom, I lost him. So, so much for that...

I do think somehow you come out stronger with one parent, especially for kids of divorced parents, you learn from their mistakes, and you make sure it doesn't happen to your kids. I know I wouldn't make the same mistake my father did.

So, it depends on a lot of things, but it's obvious having 2 dedicated parents work best for any child growing up.