Children
- Thread starter Sebastian
- Start date
I really don't think it's any more complicated than what I originally posted.
Some people are happier not having children. It may be hard for someone not of that mindset to comprehend it, but that doesn't mean it isn't true.
Right now, I wouldn't be happy to have children and it's far enough off that I can't even begin to plan for that stage of my life other than trying to be as financially secure as possible. Of course, I highly expect that to change when the time is right.
But some people will feel that way regardless of personal situation and changes in circumstances. And for those people, their reasons to not have children are just as valid as another persons reasons to have children.
I actually highly respect the people that choose not to have children because they know or feel that they wouldn't be a good parent. If you don't have those instincts (and some don't), it would be worse for everyone involved to have children just because it's the socially accepted thing to do.
Some people are happier not having children. It may be hard for someone not of that mindset to comprehend it, but that doesn't mean it isn't true.
Right now, I wouldn't be happy to have children and it's far enough off that I can't even begin to plan for that stage of my life other than trying to be as financially secure as possible. Of course, I highly expect that to change when the time is right.
But some people will feel that way regardless of personal situation and changes in circumstances. And for those people, their reasons to not have children are just as valid as another persons reasons to have children.
I actually highly respect the people that choose not to have children because they know or feel that they wouldn't be a good parent. If you don't have those instincts (and some don't), it would be worse for everyone involved to have children just because it's the socially accepted thing to do.
i can't believe sofi neg-repped me for my previous comment in this thread, maybe he should grow up.
i don't see any reason why different sex couples who are healthy and capable of reproducing choose not to bear children ... whats the point in being a couple in the first place ... it's the principle of math that 1 + 2 = 3
i don't see any reason why different sex couples who are healthy and capable of reproducing choose not to bear children ... whats the point in being a couple in the first place ... it's the principle of math that 1 + 2 = 3
I think they're smart to make a choice to go along with their lifestyle. Unfortunately, I know of a lot of people who have kids and either don't want them or weren't ready for them and it shows in how they raise the poor kids.
I don't want any kids.. I really don't see myself as someone's mother. That kind of selflessness that goes into being a good parent is amazing and I'm almost certain that's not a lifestyle for me.
I don't want any kids.. I really don't see myself as someone's mother. That kind of selflessness that goes into being a good parent is amazing and I'm almost certain that's not a lifestyle for me.
You talked about how there should be more to life than making one self happy, then you said having babies is the ultimate inner satisfaction to you. The whole point is that those people who don't want to have babies are completely different from you. Lol. They experienced something that discouraged them from ever having children. To them, that makes as much sense and is as much the ultimate inner satisfaction, as having a baby is to you.
Do you guys think that these people, by following their "ultimate personal goal", will reach the same satisfaction as people who have their own little family?
I dont know but to me, this whole family thing seems to be the most natural thing there is in life.
Also, im not saying those people who dont wish to have a family, are worse than the other type of person....just in case if it comes across this way.
I dont know but to me, this whole family thing seems to be the most natural thing there is in life.
Also, im not saying those people who dont wish to have a family, are worse than the other type of person....just in case if it comes across this way.
society teaches you to disobey your natural instincts, so having a family would be the most sensical nirvana from a physiological point of view. but then again, the brain is powerful. let's define a normal person as someone who eventually wants to get married and have children. then, let's assume a person x who played online rpgs his entire life, who hates all girls for being whores, and who doesn't want to be a part of "society" because it is big and evil.
if the normal person ends up having a baby and a wife, he will have reached his goals. if the other person dies playing warcraft and condemning society, he will also have fulfilled his goals. the positive emotions that ensue when you reach a goal are dependent on what that goal meant to you, right? the satisfaction you presume you will feel when you have a family is only a fact because of something that's sitting deep inside your little german heart. you maybe come from a very good and loving family. or, maybe you used to be a playboy but got cheated on and re-discovered that it's the opposite of the person you want to be. my point here is that you should assume that every person with a direction in life that you don't understand, have had motivators in their life that were equally encouraging as whatever it is that happened in your life that makes you want to start a family one day.
there's LOTS of families with problems. being a married father is not a safe way to happiness. and i know you made no such inclinations, just saying. happiness is very relative. it's whatever's current. life is dynamic, a day in a life is dynamic, and emotions are dynamic. everything about being living is dynamic, and so is the source for happiness. you're probably gonna reach your goal one day Sebastian, but you're also probably gonna have to live for another 30 years after that. you're not safe from having a disabled child, and you're not safe from a divorce. since we're on the subject of ultimate personal goal, there's no such thing. once you reach that goal you will only set out for another one. true happiness exists if you want it to, and some times it cannot exist at all. i'm bored with typing now, but it's not what the world gives you that settles your happiness, it's what you expected when you were given it. so in that context, i fully believe a person can live the solo life and still attain true happiness. it's just happiness of a different kind, with different payoffs.
if the normal person ends up having a baby and a wife, he will have reached his goals. if the other person dies playing warcraft and condemning society, he will also have fulfilled his goals. the positive emotions that ensue when you reach a goal are dependent on what that goal meant to you, right? the satisfaction you presume you will feel when you have a family is only a fact because of something that's sitting deep inside your little german heart. you maybe come from a very good and loving family. or, maybe you used to be a playboy but got cheated on and re-discovered that it's the opposite of the person you want to be. my point here is that you should assume that every person with a direction in life that you don't understand, have had motivators in their life that were equally encouraging as whatever it is that happened in your life that makes you want to start a family one day.
there's LOTS of families with problems. being a married father is not a safe way to happiness. and i know you made no such inclinations, just saying. happiness is very relative. it's whatever's current. life is dynamic, a day in a life is dynamic, and emotions are dynamic. everything about being living is dynamic, and so is the source for happiness. you're probably gonna reach your goal one day Sebastian, but you're also probably gonna have to live for another 30 years after that. you're not safe from having a disabled child, and you're not safe from a divorce. since we're on the subject of ultimate personal goal, there's no such thing. once you reach that goal you will only set out for another one. true happiness exists if you want it to, and some times it cannot exist at all. i'm bored with typing now, but it's not what the world gives you that settles your happiness, it's what you expected when you were given it. so in that context, i fully believe a person can live the solo life and still attain true happiness. it's just happiness of a different kind, with different payoffs.
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