can someone explain this irrational behaviour please

[ill-matic]

hello there,

I am trying to understand the thought processes behind a couple of my friends' decision making.

4 months ago I went out for a night out with some dudes.. some of which im not close with, and a couple im close with. ive been friends for one of em for 10 years. Altho we dont hang out often, we have that underlining respect for each other. can anyone relate?

anyway this friend ends up chattin up some chick. they end up hookin up etc. i was praising him to some other of my friends saying he was a real smooth motherfucker. I was happy for him cos it doesnt happen often for him. anyway, i was chattin to another one of my friends and I said something like "she looks like shes from the west tho". The western suburbs of sydney are considered less classy. The context of the comment was in humour - nothing malicious or condescending to my friend at all.

Anywho, another "friend" overheard this and decided to tell him. since then they have both been cold to me. either not responding to my texts to hang out, or by responding a week later saying "sorry i was busy". it got to a point where i even asked my good friend "have i done something to piss you off?", to which he responded "do you think you have done something to piss me off phil?". at that point i didnt know if i had done anything wrong.. so i said no. this was a couple of months ago.

so i shrugged it off and thought he was just goin thru some shit in his life or something. i duno. i forgot about it until it was another one of my close friends' birthday. we went for dinner. my mate who hooked up with that chick, the snitch boy, and a couple of other dudes were there, as well as the birthday boy. i came with my girlfriend quite early, and snitch boy and my friend were there.

they gave me the iciest reception. they were cold shouldering me completely.. being very unresponsive. i havent in a long time felt so awkward, inadequate and uncomfrotable. not to mention they werent at all interested in meeting my girlfriend for the first time.

this continued for the whole night. the birthday boy sensed it, and he himself believed it was purely because everyones "drifted" apart and gone their separate ways. lack of things in common and all that shit.

at that point I was so angry, because i thought it was completely fucking rude to be so unresponsive and unwelcoming to me. i put it down to them just becoming assholes, rather than because i did something wrong to them. so i forgot about it and just thought that people change, and friendships do too.

anyway, after this i hadnt seen them in like 2 months so i went to snitch boys birthday on saturday night. again, reception was icey as fuck. he also deliberately excluded me from the guest list of the club even though i RSVP'd to be on the guest list. the whole night i felt like a stranger. it was fucking horrible, so i left after an hour. my friend who had that birthday dinner was also here, but he stayed longer.

because he's my best friend, he told me yesterday that the reason why my mate and snitch boy were cold-shouldering me was because of that apparant comment i made about the girl he hooked up with. as a disclaimer, this girl is not his girlfriend. it was a random bitch. secondly, it was completely taken out of context. and thirdly, in a drunken rant, he began saying how he thought i was arrogant and up myself cos i was dating a good looking girl.

when my friend told me this my stomach dropped. because of some bullshit offhanded comment i made 4 months ago, about some random chick, which was said in JEST, and which was completely taken out of context, is the sole reason why i have been virtually exiled for the past 4 months. FOUR MONTHS.

now this guy has been my friend for 10 yrs like i said. i am wondering why the fuck he hasnt even approached me about this? why not come to me and allow me to defend myself out of respect for 10 years of friendship?

in typing this im actually still shocked / angry about the fact that they acted like fuckwits on my best mate's birthday dinner purely because of that. it even made HIM feel uncomfrortable - as i said before, he sensed it and believed it was just because people change and they had nothing in common.

They have done all of this to me for the past 4 months over what i consider to be a non-issue. But if he was hurt, i think he should grow balls, man up, and actually come to me and say something.

It really hurts when youve known someone for 10 years of your life, and they don't even give you that decency or courtesy to talk to you about it. instead they prefer to keep quiet, hold a grudge, and be completely fucking rude.

why is this happening? can someone clarify?

 

[ill-matic]

fuck this long thread.

 

[Da_Funk]

First of all your friend has a vagina to get offended at something like that. Second of all it sounds like you do as well for not being able to bring it up with him.


You guys are buddies for ten fucking years and you can't have a sit down the man? Grow some fucking balls and go talk to him. Like fuck, I can't believe the story you just posted.

 

[ill-matic]

First of all your friend has a vagina to get offended at something like that. Second of all it sounds like you do as well for not being able to bring it up with him.


You guys are buddies for ten fucking years and you can't have a sit down the man? Grow some fucking balls and go talk to him. Like fuck, I can't believe the story you just posted.

i have the decency not to you fuckwit. he told my friend in confidence. do you understand what that means? it means that my friend wasn't supposed to tell me. if i bring anything up, it will sour relations between them, because it was told in confidence.

fuck, do you think im that retarded ? it's burning me that i cant say shit. my hands are tied because it would compromise my friend if i said anything. im not jeapardising my friends relationship wit the dude. why is that so fucking hard to understand?

you come across as being a real simple minded fuck sometimes.

edit - i dont mean to sound aggressive, sorry.. but this situation is pissing me off. ofcourse i would say something. i like to clear the air rather than have something festering.

its fucking gay the way hes behaving. i agree with you. they are children. at my age im suprised i gotta deal with such babies. and believe me, i would confront him, and i will eventually, but in a roundabout way. tho what infuriates me is that for 4 months the cocksucker made me feel like shit, when he should have been a man and said something to me. fucking idiot.

 

[Shadows]

I was in a situation kind of similar. A friend for 5 years though.

He cold shouldered me through text's and apparently only hung out with me b/c his girl and mine were friends. (And I gave this dude a job).

I haven't talked to him for 1 year, except, We were talking and I was basically saying his girlfriend was a hoe and not to trust her b/c she fucked around with some dude and told my girl.

I made things worse by saying I found out from my girl. Eventually, my friend and his girl made up...but they got into my girlfriends head and eventually broke up an engagement (among other things too). I guess it was to get back at me? (You know, since I got into their relationship? ...I was just trying to help the brotha out though).

Anyway, I should have told him I found out from someone else. You on the other hand already had said something that you cannot take back b/c of snitch boy.

My advice from you is look at what your friend said, "Do you think you did something wrong?"
That's implying that he doesn't know that you did something wrong (otherwise he would have said it) but is still hanging on to the fact that you DID do something wrong.

Well, fuck it. Say "We have drifted since we hung out a while back. I don't believe I said or did anything wrong, if anything I praised your smoothness when you put on your pimp status. (Praise him don't say since you got that girl, otherwise, it would make it seem negative toward her.)....I have everything I need and want, but for a 10 year friendship to be ruined and doesn't want to be talked about, how much do you value our friendship? I think we should kick it alone. Then if things are cool, we can kick it with just us guys or do a double date. I would have asked sooner, but with school and probably things with your life, we have not had time to come to terms. I hope we can continue our friendship and talk whatever it is out." (This is based off me reading about you stressed on school).

Your friends should really watch what they repeat. Snitch boy = a bitch. Your friend should wonder why snitch boy would even say something to jeopardize friendship(s).

 

[ArtsyGirl]

I could understand his reaction IF this was a girl he was serious about/loved. But some random chick? From a guy an acceptable reaction would be to give you shit or prank you in some way ie shave your eyebrowns when you passed out etc...

But unless you know exactly what "snitch boy" said to him you can't be sure he didn't make it worse than it was and therefore created an extreme reaction.

If you can see yourself getting over his treatment of you, then at some point in the future, if the cold shoulder persists, ask him why you guys don't seem to be as close and that you'd like things to be as they were.. If he cant bring up his issues he has with you then shut it down. He has officially turned into a 14 year old girl and is no longer worth your time or energy.

 

[S O F I]

I was happy for him cos it doesnt happen often for him.

This, to him, is arrogant behavior. It's condescending. The most interesting thing is that you didn't even say this for him to start believing you're arrogant. It wasn't even the joke I quoted below. His view and the view of your other friends as arrogant is something that has been building up for years. The drunken rant I also quoted below illustrates what he's been thinking for years.

If you take a step back and think to yourself about what you said up there, you should be able to easily see how that would be offensive. You're happy for him. That's great. But because it doesn't happen often? Not so great. No guy wants to be known as the guy who rarely pulls chicks. If another guy points it or has that mindset, that can easily be seen as arrogant behavior regardless if it's the truth. It's offensive. The fact that you have a good looking girl only further goes against you. It's not your fault, but it just makes it easy for them to think so.

anyway, i was chattin to another one of my friends and I said something like "she looks like shes from the west tho". The western suburbs of sydney are considered less classy.

In my country, we have a saying. "U sali, uvali". It basically means that in a joke, you stick it to someone. You think it's harmless, but if there's truth in the joke, the joke is offensive. Also, if you have a good-looking girl NOT from the "west", that's easily seen as making a strong point. It says, "my girl is THIS, your girl is THAT". That also is arrogant to the person on the side.

in a drunken rant, he began saying how he thought i was arrogant and up myself cos i was dating a good looking girl.

Again, to reiterate, he and the other guys have held this view for years and your behavior, although unknown to you, further went to prove it to them.

Does this mean you're arrogant? It's not on me to decide. I'm just explaining the thought process behind your friends' actions. I don't have advice for you.

 

[Duke]

To continue on SOFI's post:

That explains the thought process somewhat, but from phil's story it becomes clear that it was mostly the specific incident that set it all off. You'd think that if his friends were annoyed by his behaviour, justified or not, it would be a sum of things, instead it seems it was this specific event that triggered it. That's kind of weird, imo.

 

[ill-matic]

This, to him, is arrogant behavior. It's condescending. The most interesting thing is that you didn't even say this for him to start believing you're arrogant. It wasn't even the joke I quoted below. His view and the view of your other friends as arrogant is something that has been building up for years. The drunken rant I also quoted below illustrates what he's been thinking for years.

Where did you get the notion that it has been building up for years? Based on 5 paragraphs I've written? You can't gauge that much based on that - and one scenario isn't a reflection of an entire 10 year friendship. Sorry, but you're wrong here.

If you take a step back and think to yourself about what you said up there, you should be able to easily see how that would be offensive. You're happy for him. That's great. But because it doesn't happen often? Not so great. No guy wants to be known as the guy who rarely pulls chicks. If another guy points it or has that mindset, that can easily be seen as arrogant behavior regardless if it's the truth. It's offensive. The fact that you have a good looking girl only further goes against you. It's not your fault, but it just makes it easy for them to think so.

Yes, I am happy for him. Everything I said was encouraging - and not in a cheesy way. But it was in a way in which boys support each other. It was more of a "you smooth motherfucker.. go smash that pussy. good on ya". That is not condescending at all. That's comradery and men back slapping each other in congratulations. If something like that is considered demeaning then fuck this politically correct world because I seemingly don't fit into it.

I never mentioned anything to him, or any of my other friends that I was happy for him because it doesn't happen often for him. And what's wrong with stating the facts? The guy hardly goes clubbing, and doesn't meet new girls that often. Is it wrong of me to think that? I was happy that he was happy - moreso because his happiness was borne through meeting a girl that night and hooking up with her. I'm sure to himself he must have felt extra happy because he too knows that it doesn't happen often. Furthermore, he's said to me on many occasions that he just "wants to meet a girl".

However, like i said before, I never made any mention of the fact that it didn't happen often for him, and in my opinion that's not arrogant in the least. It would be arrogant if I communicated that in a demeaning way such as "ohhh it's about time man.. finally!' That would definitely be condescending and would be cause for concern. But I never said any such thing and so being labelled arrogant is unfair. In fact, in typing this, I definitely recall actually saying "she's pretty cute".

Furthermore, it shows more about their own insecurities if they correlate a comment like that and the fact that my girlfriend is good looking with arrogance. Perhaps if they weren't so emotionally insecure about themselves, they wouldn't feel the need to be so defensive and like they were being attacked.

In my country, we have a saying. "U sali, uvali". It basically means that in a joke, you stick it to someone. You think it's harmless, but if there's truth in the joke, the joke is offensive. Also, if you have a good-looking girl NOT from the "west", that's easily seen as making a strong point. It says, "my girl is THIS, your girl is THAT". That also is arrogant to the person on the side.

Fair enough. This, I can concede. But in all honesty, give me a break. It was an offhanded comment meant in jest with absolutely no malicious intent. As i mentioned above, I did say openly to a number of people "she's pretty cute" - which I think should outweigh any negative comment I made in jest. I mean, so fucking what if she's from the 'west'... she's cute.. so shut the fuck up. Know what I mean? It was a random bitch he met in a club who he was playing tonsil football with...who gives a flying fuck? Again, this comes down to his own insecurities rather than me actually being arrogant.

Again, to reiterate, he and the other guys have held this view for years and your behavior, although unknown to you, further went to prove it to them.

Does this mean you're arrogant? It's not on me to decide. I'm just explaining the thought process behind your friends' actions. I don't have advice for you.

I don't know how you can say that with such conviction. You can't gauge that much from 5 paragraphs.

Anyway, I don't hang out with them often enough for them to build that impression of me. I don't tell them about what I do, who I'm fucking, where I've been - I keep that shit to myself out of fear of being perceived as arrogant. I don't like to draw attention to myself for this very reason. This stems from childhood issues which I've thought long and hard over. But anyway.. there's no reason for them to think I'm that kind of person.

Furthermore, in his drunken rant he even said how i thought I was cool cos I hung out with some 30 yr old who knows the door bitches at different clubs. Yet Ive mentioned the guy only in passing (as an example, if someone asks me what i did on the weekend, i would just tell them i went to X club with Y dude... no details, none of this "ohhh well i did this, this , this and this.).. So i literally am clueless as to how he would come to that conclusion. This makes me believe the whole arrogant tag stems from his own insecurities rather than my actual actions or behaviour. But who knows?

My mate he was confiding in even said "come on, you know hes not like that" and he replied by saying "yeh yeh i know i know".. What does that suggest?

Even still.. for the sake of 10 yrs of friendship he should come to me and talk to me about it, and give me the respect and the decency of hearing my side of it rather than holding a ridiculous and seemingly never ending grudge for the past 4 fucking months.


BTW - I meant to quote you, not thank you. lol.

 

[Duke]

You post a long story about behaviour and you want people to have a go at explaining it.

SOFI has a go.

You scold SOFI for "getting that much out of 5 paragraphs"


I mean, c'mon, lol.

 

[ill-matic]

^^ lol nah just disagreeing. it's a valid point. let's stick to the facts @ hand instead of making big assumptions??

 

[S O F I]

Where did you get the notion that it has been building up for years?

I'm good at this.

But no. Here:

1. For a somewhat silly remark, your friend(s) gave you the cold shoulder for a LOOOOONG period of time. Friends who fuck each other's girlfriend don't stay mad at each other this long. That is one indicator that their feelings about you stem from other incidents. This incident was the tipping point.

Yes, I am happy for him. Everything I said was encouraging - and not in a cheesy way. But it was in a way in which boys support each other. It was more of a "you smooth motherfucker.. go smash that pussy. good on ya". That is not condescending at all.

You're missing the whole point of my post. You are trying to prove to me that it wasn't condescending because of what you THINK and BELIEVE, but I'm telling you what YOUR friends thought and believed after the remark. The fact that they were so butt-hurt after this doesn't go to show that they're irrational. It goes to show that this was one of many incidents where they saw your behavior as arrogant and condescending. Maybe, they just wanted a reason to stop talking to you for whatever other reason. But I think it's the former.

That's comradery and men back slapping each other in congratulations. If something like that is considered demeaning then fuck this politically correct world because I seemingly don't fit into it.

If it was a single incident, what you said would have been forgotten in an instant. But, coming from YOU, those words had A HUGE IMPACT because of their perception of who you are and how you see them.

I never mentioned anything to him, or any of my other friends that I was happy for him because it doesn't happen often for him. And what's wrong with stating the facts? The guy hardly goes clubbing, and doesn't meet new girls that often. Is it wrong of me to think that?

I'm just saying, with that MINDSET, you're essentially providing a perspective on how you SEE your friend and coupled with the "girl looks western" comment, it makes a relatively strong argument that you're condescending regardless of your intentions. It's not what your true intentions are, but how they are perceived. But my point pointing that out was to show that it's interesting that he views you as arrogant based off of ONE remark, but essentially there's TWO examples (one said, one unsaid).

However, like i said before, I never made any mention of the fact that it didn't happen often for him, and in my opinion that's not arrogant in the least.

which further goes to show that the guy and the snitch have had something against you for an extended period of time.

It would be arrogant if I communicated that in a demeaning way such as "ohhh it's about time man.. finally!' That would definitely be condescending and would be cause for concern. But I never said any such thing and so being labelled arrogant is unfair. In fact, in typing this, I definitely recall actually saying "she's pretty cute".

I bet my paypal money if the comment came from some other friend, he wouldn't have gotten butt-hurt. But what you said offended him and offended him for a reason. There's a logical explanation out there for them not wanting to talk to you and my belief is that they've had a perception of you before the incident as arrogant and condescending. If you don't agree, fine man, but you're not helping yourself.

Furthermore, it shows more about their own insecurities if they correlate a comment like that and the fact that my girlfriend is good looking with arrogance. Perhaps if they weren't so emotionally insecure about themselves, they wouldn't feel the need to be so defensive and like they were being attacked.

Very well.

Again, this comes down to his own insecurities rather than me actually being arrogant.

The issue is not whether you're really arrogant or not, but how you're perceived by those friends who got mad. It very well could be the insecurities. Does that take the weight off your shoulders because then any guilt you might have is removed? I'm asking the question, not saying anything with it. In the end, they were mad for an extended period of time and an isolated incident where ONE remark was made just doesn't make sense unless there's more to it.

I keep that shit to myself out of fear of being perceived as arrogant.

You have the fear, why? Because somewhere somehow, you became aware that you appeared arrogant somewhere, somehow. I don't see how this detracts from what I've been saying.

Furthermore, in his drunken rant he even said how i thought I was cool cos I hung out with some 30 yr old who knows the door bitches at different clubs.

Another example of how this wasn't an isolated incident but the perception they've held has been held for an extended period of time. Don't take "years" literally.

Even still.. for the sake of 10 yrs of friendship he should come to me and talk to me about it, and give me the respect and the decency of hearing my side of it rather than holding a ridiculous and seemingly never ending grudge for the past 4 fucking months.

I agree. He should have.


Edit: Also, I understand my post is on some "this is the right way, you're wrong" shit lol and I apologize but that's how I've been groomed in the business school. You gotta state your case with conviction.

 

[Chronic]

I think there's definitely some truth to what S O F I is saying. It's something that's been building up for a while.

Mucho agree with this:

you're essentially providing a perspective on how you SEE your friend

Even if you put it nicely I wouldn't like to hear from a friend that he's taking pity on me.

 

[Bobby Sands]

that comment about the girl was a bit snide and snobby imo.

 

[ill-matic]

Well, if he was hurt by what I said then I am more than happy to apologise to him, and to clear the air. And I will confront him eventually, just not now because i dont want to compromise my friend who told me.

I just am bothered by the way this has been dealt with. They even had the audacity to ruin my friends birthday dinner over this issue by being deliberately cold-shouldered. It created an icey environment. My friend told me that the dude apologised to him a few days after it but didn't explain why he was like that, hence my friend thinking it was just friends going their separate ways.

This is what bothers me. It's that i've virtually been made an outcast over this issue. I see what you're saying SOFI, but a big part of my point is that their response to this situation has been quite childish. Why not approach me and sort it out? Why not tell me? Why not speak out? Why the fuck is it necessary to maintain a grudge for 4 months (and counting) over something like this?

Yes, i may be in the wrong with what i said and should watch my comments, particularly if they can be taken out of context, and if i hurt someone i will apologise. But to ignore me, cold-shoulder me, be unresponsive and make me feel unwelcome and inadequate DELIBERATELY is just low in my opinion. and all this time i had no idea what was going on. is that really fair?

i understand what youre saying about them having issues with me for a while. he's a "good" friend based on the fact that we've been friends for 10 years.. It's more based on the history over anything else. I don't regularly hang out with him, and i dont engage in conversation about details of my life too often with him. It's more occasioanally hang out, see a movie, or go out and get pissed. Moreso, this year we've only done that a handful of times. With snitch boy, well I've actually never had a "one on one" convo with him to be honest.. all we do is joke around and shit..

I just dont see where an issue with me could come from. In a nut shell, they dont know enough about me to form a perception of me being arrogant, and i never hung out with them enough for them to begin to have "issues" with me.. or to have any issues with them in the first place. I hope that makes sense?

Maybe I'm wrong.. i duno. But other friends of mine who actually know me would vouch for me. this is the first time i have had a "conflict" with someone in a long time, so it's kinda weird to have to face this again.

as for keeping things about myself to myself out of fear of appearing arrogant or pretentious - i think i phrased this wrong. I just found a lot of the time when i was younger that whenever i spoke about some good news in my life people would seem very disinterested.. or if i was looking for advice, people who i considered friends didn't seem too welcoming.. Also, my parents weren't very responsive during my birthdays. So when it came to things to do with ME, i just felt that no one would wanna know about it. So i dont tell people much about my life because im used to just assuming that they wont give a fuck anyway, so i dont say shit. I dont bring attention to myself like that.

 

[Casey]

The thing is, that maybe this seems like the first time your friend has gotten upset with you, based upon his reaction, but for all you know, you might have pissed him off loads of times in the past but he's just not said anything and forgiven you.

I was in that situation with a former friend. The guy regularly pissed me off, was completely insensitive a lot of the time, and would run his mouth and say hurtful things. But aside from that he was a good mate and I'd known him for 8 years or so.

I lost count of the amount of times that he'd piss me off and I'd just ignore it for the sake of our friendship. Or he'd piss me off, I'd ignore him for a while, but then forgive him and hang out with him again. I suspect that most of these times he did not know that he had upset me.

Anyway, it got to a point where I was just getting sick of it, and then he happened to do it again, quite badly. I haven't spoken to him since and neither do I have any intention to. It got to the point where our friendship history wasn't balancing out with the dumbass things he would say and the amount of times he would piss me off. Shit happens, people change, people move on. There are factors that you just don't need in your life at a certain point.

Perhaps you are one of these factors for this person. Apologise if you mean it, sure maybe make an effort to try and hang out with the friend, and if he's still the same way with you, just accept it for what it is and find a new friend.

 

[Da_Funk]

i have the decency not to you fuckwit. he told my friend in confidence. do you understand what that means? it means that my friend wasn't supposed to tell me. if i bring anything up, it will sour relations between them, because it was told in confidence.

fuck, do you think im that retarded ? it's burning me that i cant say shit. my hands are tied because it would compromise my friend if i said anything. im not jeapardising my friends relationship wit the dude. why is that so fucking hard to understand?

you come across as being a real simple minded fuck sometimes.

edit - i dont mean to sound aggressive, sorry.. but this situation is pissing me off. ofcourse i would say something. i like to clear the air rather than have something festering.

its fucking gay the way hes behaving. i agree with you. they are children. at my age im suprised i gotta deal with such babies. and believe me, i would confront him, and i will eventually, but in a roundabout way. tho what infuriates me is that for 4 months the cocksucker made me feel like shit, when he should have been a man and said something to me. fucking idiot.

I'm simple minded? lol ok...

Read between the fucking lines bra. You figured this shit out for yourself, buddy just confirmed it for you. Just be the bigger man and own up to it already. If he gets pissed at your other buddy when you already knew w/o him telling you.. well why is he a friend in the first place?

 

[masta247]

What the fuck I just can't picture a situation like this happening to me and my friends.
It really sounds like your friends are way too sensitive. And even if they think that you're arrogant they are retarded for not confronting you about this. It all sounds too strange to me, that comment seems really subtle.
I could understand "your mother is a whore" (if she really was) could be sort of offensive but regardless of that if they are your friends it shouldn't turn into a few months of no-contact.

On a side note I found out that strangers find others arrogant just because they're more successful - whether it's the fact that you've graduated from a good school, have a better job, good looking girlfriend, come from a specific place etc. You really have to act perfect to gain their trust and convince them otherwise but some people put an "asshole" stamp on you and would rather stay away.
Personally I find it silly how people treat me when they get to know where I study or when I'm in a smaller town when they get to know where I'm from. I see their reactions and it seems like they'd rather stay away from me because that makes me an asshole or something.
They probably think that I feel superior to them and they can't treat me the same as if I were on "their level" or something - I have no idea how it works though.
I find these people interesting, think that they might be interested in my life while instead it makes them turn hostile.
I think it might be a similar thing with you and your girl and your "friends". Maybe they're somewhat jealous and don't want to meet you just to not think about it?

 

[Flipmo]

Get the fuck out of here with the psychobabble talk. Pure and simple, the west comment is nothing to get your panties twisted about. So the guy doesn't pick up much often, and Illmatic was happy for him. Shit my friend is the same, he doesn't pick up often cause of self confidence issues, but I still encourage him. It's not snobby, it's how shit is sometimes. The west comment is nothing to freak out about.
You know what Illmatic, throw me all these West chicks and call them old hags with crusty vagins... I will run through them all, and I won't give a shit.
That's the problem with people nowadays, they get their feelings hurt for every piece of shit, and then ignoring you for 4 months or giving you the cold shoulder. Yah, welcome to my girlfriend when I was 15 yrs old. cmon man. Now I don't know the relationship you and your buddy have, but from what I can see in this description...I can tell you only someone who is insecure would only get bothered by a comment like that. He liked the girl, he picked her up, he may have thought she was hot. So what does he care about the comment made?
This has happened to me before, I like chicks with meat on them, and I've dated girls that my friends would never date (not that they were ugly, but my friends like that slim look, I like a big ass and big thighs lol). They've poked jokes before and all that, but I never cared. Know why? Cause I was happy and I liked what I saw. If your buddy picked up a chick just for the fuck of it and to seek approval. That's his issue, not yours.

I gotta finish my fucking paper now, FUCK. :angry:

 

[vg4030]

Your name is Phil? LMAO