Future and Happiness

[S O F I]

I dont know but i belong to the first group of people youve mentioned.

No, you're not, Tina left you. All you have is your apprenticeship.

 

[Sebastian]

I am sure there are people out there who believe they have their lives figured out. They are in serious relationships and they plan on soon or eventually being married, having children and happily living out their lives. I'm sure there are also plenty of people who are single, but are pretty much certain that they will someday get married and settle down and find happiness.

I was merely talking about this part.

You piece of shit.

 

[S O F I]

I was merely talking about this part.

You piece of shit.

lmao!!!

 

[Jokerman]

I'm wondering how many people out there have serious doubts they will find the happiness in their lives that they are constantly seeking. People who live in fear that they will never live the lives they want to live, never achieve their goals or realize their dreams. I mean, many people on this planet don't find true happiness and don't embrace the futures they desire.

Instead of having one's happiness be dependent on achieving one's goals, or on living the life one wants, we should understand that happiness is available to us at any time. It’s our choice. We are often so preoccupied about getting someplace else that we forget about where we are right at the moment. Sometimes the moment has to practically come up and shake us by the collar, demanding our attention and appreciation.

Self-improvement is great, but focusing on change should not be an obsession. If it is, it robs you of your enjoyment of the present. So while I may desire to change, and focus on getting there, the end point does not preoccupy my thoughts. Getting to where I’m going is a process, and every step of that process is essential and vital. I’m not going to say, “I will not like my life until I have it the way I want it.” No, I’m going to like my life at every moment during the time it takes to change. Today is where your life is right now, and you own today the way you own a unique, perishable, and nonexchangeable gift.

Most people plan on really being able to savor life only after a particular event. Then the event comes and goes, and another one replaces it. For instance, some people plan on being happy after:

they graduate;
they find a mate;
they get a job;
they get married;
they buy a house;
they have a baby;
they have a second baby;
the children are both out of the house;
they’ve amassed a certain level of assets;
the children both graduate;
they retire.

Life becomes a waiting game, with enjoyment put on hold as one anticipates a constantly changing series of circumstances.

I remember as a child sitting with a woman who was in her seventies on the block where we lived. She had a wonderful garden out back; and she would always have sassafras tea. I loved the way it smelled. We would sit there on the swing. She was always at peace. And I remember asking her (I was only about twelve): “Are you going to die soon? Are you afraid of that?”

The questions seem a little nervy, but I was curious, and my mother had told me to always say what I felt, never to edit it out. The lady said that she wasn’t afraid. She explained that she was not afraid of death because she had never been afraid of life. She had always lived with a sense of purpose in life, and that was simply to be a happy person. This seemed true; I never saw her when she was not able to be happy. When you were around her, you felt joy, peace, and love. You saw it in how she tended her garden and how she would take flowers to all the neighbors. Those are simple things, and that’s why when people say, “Oh, I don’t have enough money for this, and I don’t have that,” I think of how simple life can be, and of the simple pleasures, like noticing new buds on plants, or watching birds at a feeder, or walking in fresh snow. We forget about the simple pleasures until we’re given an environment where we can enjoy them. Then we remember again.

The lady lived about five more years. But she was never depressed. There was never a sense of fatalism or defeat. And yet now I see people who, by the age of thirty, are already developing this mindset. They feel they haven’t achieved enough. Where are they now? they ask. How many points have they racked up in the career game? What have they got to show for their lives?

You’ve got a lot to show if you’re willing to acknowledge it. Of course if you’re only willing to acknowledge what you don’t have, in terms of the material things, or your “goals,” you might have to call yourself a failure. But then that would be a false standard to measure a life by, as I learned from my neighbor on a swing.

I’m present for the flow of my life. I’m not making my decisions from fear or limitation or illusion or conditioned self. I don’t have to wait until everything is right, until I have enough money or enough support. I’m my own support. Money is not what supports me. Faith in myself supports me. It’s not about your job, or your friends or your possessions. It’s about starting your journey with one step, but that step shouldn’t be a step forward. It should be a step away from distraction, from busyness, from judging, and from the emotions you use to protect yourself.

 

[Lil KaMiKaZe]

Instead of having one's happiness be dependent on achieving one's goals, or on living the life one wants, we should understand that happiness is available to us at any time. It’s our choice. We are often so preoccupied about getting someplace else that we forget about where we are right at the moment. Sometimes the moment has to practically come up and shake us by the collar, demanding our attention and appreciation.

Self-improvement is great, but focusing on change should not be an obsession. If it is, it robs you of your enjoyment of the present. So while I may desire to change, and focus on getting there, the end point does not preoccupy my thoughts. Getting to where I’m going is a process, and every step of that process is essential and vital. I’m not going to say, “I will not like my life until I have it the way I want it.” No, I’m going to like my life at every moment during the time it takes to change. Today is where your life is right now, and you own today the way you own a unique, perishable, and nonexchangeable gift.

Most people plan on really being able to savor life only after a particular event. Then the event comes and goes, and another one replaces it. For instance, some people plan on being happy after:

they graduate;
they find a mate;
they get a job;
they get married;
they buy a house;
they have a baby;
they have a second baby;
the children are both out of the house;
they’ve amassed a certain level of assets;
the children both graduate;
they retire.

Life becomes a waiting game, with enjoyment put on hold as one anticipates a constantly changing series of circumstances.

I remember as a child sitting with a woman who was in her seventies on the block where we lived. She had a wonderful garden out back; and she would always have sassafras tea. I loved the way it smelled. We would sit there on the swing. She was always at peace. And I remember asking her (I was only about twelve): “Are you going to die soon? Are you afraid of that?”

The questions seem a little nervy, but I was curious, and my mother had told me to always say what I felt, never to edit it out. The lady said that she wasn’t afraid. She explained that she was not afraid of death because she had never been afraid of life. She had always lived with a sense of purpose in life, and that was simply to be a happy person. This seemed true; I never saw her when she was not able to be happy. When you were around her, you felt joy, peace, and love. You saw it in how she tended her garden and how she would take flowers to all the neighbors. Those are simple things, and that’s why when people say, “Oh, I don’t have enough money for this, and I don’t have that,” I think of how simple life can be, and of the simple pleasures, like noticing new buds on plants, or watching birds at a feeder, or walking in fresh snow. We forget about the simple pleasures until we’re given an environment where we can enjoy them. Then we remember again.

The lady lived about five more years. But she was never depressed. There was never a sense of fatalism or defeat. And yet now I see people who, by the age of thirty, are already developing this mindset. They feel they haven’t achieved enough. Where are they now? they ask. How many points have they racked up in the career game? What have they got to show for their lives?

You’ve got a lot to show if you’re willing to acknowledge it. Of course if you’re only willing to acknowledge what you don’t have, in terms of the material things, or your “goals,” you might have to call yourself a failure. But then that would be a false standard to measure a life by, as I learned from my neighbor on a swing.

I’m present for the flow of my life. I’m not making my decisions from fear or limitation or illusion or conditioned self. I don’t have to wait until everything is right, until I have enough money or enough support. I’m my own support. Money is not what supports me. Faith in myself supports me. It’s not about your job, or your friends or your possessions. It’s about starting your journey with one step, but that step shouldn’t be a step forward. It should be a step away from distraction, from busyness, from judging, and from the emotions you use to protect yourself.

lol even though it's hard to "practice",this is soooooo right...