Domestic Abuse Video Starring Keira Knightley

[S. Fourteen]

Take the piss all you want - but what would you do if that was your mum

Yea yea. My mom got a job while raising her kids, dealt with the cultural and religious stigma of divorcing my dad and got the fuck outta the abusive relationship. And keep in mind that she moved to another country when she was 17 years old, and after 20 years of marriage in another country, she took her kids and came back to the states without receiving a cent from my dad or a third party

This glamorized video doesn't mean much to me.

 

[Da_Funk]

Yea yea. My mom got a job while raising her kids, dealt with the cultural and religious stigma of divorcing my dad and got the fuck outta the abusive relationship. And keep in mind that she moved to another country when she was 17 years old, and after 20 years of marriage in another country, she took her kids and came back to the states without receiving a cent from my dad or a third party

This glamorized video doesn't mean much to me.

Word. What it all comes down to is will power and strength of person. Thats why I don't feel bad for people who go back to abusive relationships and drug addicts.

 

[_carmi]

Yea yea. My mom got a job while raising her kids, dealt with the cultural and religious stigma of divorcing my dad and got the fuck outta the abusive relationship. And keep in mind that she moved to another country when she was 17 years old, and after 20 years of marriage in another country, she took her kids and came back to the states without receiving a cent from my dad or a third party

This glamorized video doesn't mean much to me.

Your mom was strong. Most people are not strong like that. Obviously this video is glamorized and doesn't represent real life domestic abuse, but still creating awareness is important in a world where people think the women (educated and uneducated) who stick with men who hit them are dumb. They're not, they are stuck in a pattern.

 

[S O F I]

Yea yea. My mom got a job while raising her kids, dealt with the cultural and religious stigma of divorcing my dad and got the fuck outta the abusive relationship. And keep in mind that she moved to another country when she was 17 years old, and after 20 years of marriage in another country, she took her kids and came back to the states without receiving a cent from my dad or a third party

This glamorized video doesn't mean much to me.

So what happens to the women who aren't strong, who can't raise their kids alone, and can't overpower the religious stigma of divorcing a husband?

Your argument doesn't address that issue, the issue which is at the core of domestic violence. So, what are you really saying? Your mom is strong? Awesome. What about women who aren't strong? You and Duke are saying, "tough luck, you should be strong, what the fuck is wrong with you?" That's a great way of helping battered women.

The money donation that pisses Duke off is aimed to further shed light on domestic violence and to support battered women's shelters and support groups who work hard at making women strong enough to resist abuse and leave their husbands.

 

[S. Fourteen]

So what happens to the women who aren't strong, who can't raise their kids alone, and can't overpower the religious stigma of divorcing a husband?

First of all, I do think my mom is strong but she ain't superwoman.

How about waking up and smelling the coffee? Or raising your daughter to have some self-respect? I'm a little tired of people asking for my money at every turn. This shit reminds me of Paris Hilton wearing a ribbon to spread AIDS awareness. Yeah right!

If you are not going to help yourself.. tough luck, you loose, survival of the fittest.

 

[k69atie]

Your mom was strong. Most people are not strong like that. Obviously this video is glamorized and doesn't represent real life domestic abuse, but still creating awareness is important in a world where people think the women (educated and uneducated) who stick with men who hit them are dumb. They're not, they are stuck in a pattern.

Well said :thumb: xxxx

 

[k69atie]

So what happens to the women who aren't strong, who can't raise their kids alone, and can't overpower the religious stigma of divorcing a husband?

Your argument doesn't address that issue, the issue which is at the core of domestic violence. So, what are you really saying? Your mom is strong? Awesome. What about women who aren't strong? You and Duke are saying, "tough luck, you should be strong, what the fuck is wrong with you?" That's a great way of helping battered women.

The money donation that pisses Duke off is aimed to further shed light on domestic violence and to support battered women's shelters and support groups who work hard at making women strong enough to resist abuse and leave their husbands.

Some very good points :thumb: xx

 

[Duke]

I do somewhat agree with salty. Obviously, it's a complicated affair, and to put it like I'm about to put it is very blunt and direct and not entirely accurate.

BUT.


No matter how many factors are playing in the background, an abused spouse isn't tied to the bed. It's still your own decision, own choice.


Also, FUCK awareness.
for EVERYTHING
awareness this awareness that
its just that since we're so "AWARE" it makes us feel less shitty for NOT DOING SHIT ABOUT IT
stories like people getting beat up in trains
women raped while 20 bystanders LOOK and do fucking nothing
and you're asking me for money to help women that get beat up run away?
awareness
awareness my sweet ethiopian starving ass, would they say in Mogadishu


exactly
"im aware"
yeah by now we're all aware of china raping tibet
what are we doing again?
nothing
oh yeah!
we're being "aware"

BE AWARE OF BREAST CANCER
they say
very aware
nice pink ribbon
but actually change our society so we dont consume whatever cancercausing products are out there?
nuh-uh
AWARENESS
they shout
for abused women
and the next time hillbilly jack wails on little sally in public, we're all gonna make a circle, look and do fucking nothing
afterwards we shake our heads and make an awareness commcercial
get the fuck out

[/endrant]


copy-pasted MSN rant.


fuck you.

 

[k69atie]

The video isn't glamorizing anything - it is called trying to raise awareness to people who are stuck in violent relationships - so your mum got out of hers - good on her. But it isn't that easy as you make it sound.

In the Uk most women don't even call the poilce until the 32nd attack.

These women have been abused in all ways possible to the pint where they think that the abuse is their fault and that they deserve it as that is what they are made to believe - do you think they are going to leave if they think it is their fault "for not having in dinner cooked on time" or "burning the steak" or whatever.

If these adverts help one woman to leave a violent partner and let them know that help is available for them then maybe - they might just find the courage to leave.

 

[S. Fourteen]

The video isn't glamorizing anything - it is called trying to raise awareness to people who are stuck in violent relationships.

See, that "raise awareness" is the bullshit part. So you need some attractive celebrity to be aware of this shit? Movie stars need to have exotic meals at 5 star hotels to raise funds? Give me a break! Ohhhhhhh some coke head celebrity is telling me to be strong so I should leave my abusive man!! Haaaa. No wonder she has no will to leave in the first place.

Really, it's survival of the fittest. The only ass I'm wiping is my own or my loved ones.

 

[Preach]

Word. What it all comes down to is will power and strength of person. Thats why I don't feel bad for people who go back to abusive relationships and drug addicts.

This is what I don't get. Most people feel bad for people in wheelchairs, they feel bad for people that have to amputate a leg, or people that have a stroke and can't talk right for the rest of their life. But why is mental weakness any different? You don't condemn a physically disabled person for their flaw as if it were their fault that they fell and broke their back, because it's not. So why do you blame a person that was neglected by their shitty parents and treated like shit their entire life for thinking that's all there is in this world? Or worse yet, that it is all they deserve. Why is this somehow any less tragic, and any more worthy of prejudice, than breaking a leg and limping for the rest of your life? A traumatizing event, if you think metaphorically, has that affect on people. They are mentally crippled for life.

Most people with strong antisocial behavior (which I consider willingly taking beatings to be) practice said behavior due to a traumatizing event from their past. Just like a seed grows into a tree with branches that stretch upwards, sideways and downwards in every direction, so will a traumatizing event disable your mind in different and some times unexpected ways. If you take any adult woman of around 30 years of age that stays with her abusive husband, it's likely she has been undergoing this process of letting that traumatizing seed spire for 15-20 years. You don't just turn around and walk away from stuff like that.

Asking them to just leave the husband is like if I told you to hate jews (assuming you don't already). Just hate them. Fucking hate them with all your heart. Kill-on-sight. Fuck those motherfuckers. Why? Because I think they're wrong and they suck. That's all the reason you need, I hate them, so you should hate them too. That's exactly the same. EXACTLY the same. I can go on with examples. It's like telling a Muslim fundamentalist his beliefs are stupid and expect him to agree. It's like telling a conservative American that there should be no federal reserve bank and expecting him to agree.

(Btw. I'm not just talking out of my ass here, and making stupid wild comparisons because I want to win the argument. They are 100% realistic.)

 

[Da_Funk]

This is what I don't get. Most people feel bad for people in wheelchairs, they feel bad for people that have to amputate a leg, or people that have a stroke and can't talk right for the rest of their life. But why is mental weakness any different? You don't condemn a physically disabled person for their flaw as if it were their fault that they fell and broke their back, because it's not. So why do you blame a person that was neglected by their shitty parents and treated like shit their entire life for thinking that's all there is in this world? Or worse yet, that it is all they deserve. Why is this somehow any less tragic, and any more worthy of prejudice, than breaking a leg and limping for the rest of your life? A traumatizing event, if you think metaphorically, has that affect on people. They are mentally crippled for life.

Most people with strong antisocial behavior (which I consider willingly taking beatings to be) practice said behavior due to a traumatizing event from their past. Just like a seed grows into a tree with branches that stretch upwards, sideways and downwards in every direction, so will a traumatizing event disable your mind in different and some times unexpected ways. If you take any adult woman of around 30 years of age that stays with her abusive husband, it's likely she has been undergoing this process of letting that traumatizing seed spire for 15-20 years. You don't just turn around and walk away from stuff like that.

Asking them to just leave the husband is like if I told you to hate jews (assuming you don't already). Just hate them. Fucking hate them with all your heart. Kill-on-sight. Fuck those motherfuckers. Why? Because I think they're wrong and they suck. That's all the reason you need, I hate them, so you should hate them too. That's exactly the same. EXACTLY the same. I can go on with examples. It's like telling a Muslim fundamentalist his beliefs are stupid and expect him to agree. It's like telling a conservative American that there should be no federal reserve bank and expecting him to agree.

(Btw. I'm not just talking out of my ass here, and making stupid wild comparisons because I want to win the argument. They are 100% realistic.)

You can recover from that traumatizing event. You get in a car crash and are paralyzed for life? Thats something you have no control over, its total chance. Someone treats you like shit and you think that you deserve to be treated like that so you go back to it? Fuck that, thats the dumbest shit i've ever heard. Where's your sense of pride? Like salty said, its survival of the fittest.

I'm not saying I agree with domestic abuse, or abuse of any kind for that matter. What I'm saying is that if someone hits you, you stand up for yourself. If you go asking for it again, or go running back to it, I'm not gonna pity you in the least.

PS your example is rediculous or maybe I'm one of the few people who actually use their brain to think.

 

[S O F I]

First of all, I do think my mom is strong but she ain't superwoman.

How about waking up and smelling the coffee? Or raising your daughter to have some self-respect? I'm a little tired of people asking for my money at every turn. This shit reminds me of Paris Hilton wearing a ribbon to spread AIDS awareness. Yeah right!

Clearly you're competent enough to separate the issue from the money. Being asked to donate two dollars a month shouldn't matter in your perspective on domestic violence. It seems that related factors are affecting your perspective; you're cynical about the issues in domestic violence BECAUSE it angers you that they ask for money. That's how it seems to me.

If you are not going to help yourself.. tough luck, you loose, survival of the fittest.

It's surprising that these words are coming from a clinically depressed person.

Also, it's lose.

I do somewhat agree with salty. Obviously, it's a complicated affair, and to put it like I'm about to put it is very blunt and direct and not entirely accurate.

BUT.


No matter how many factors are playing in the background, an abused spouse isn't tied to the bed. It's still your own decision, own choice.


Also, FUCK awareness.
for EVERYTHING
awareness this awareness that
its just that since we're so "AWARE" it makes us feel less shitty for NOT DOING SHIT ABOUT IT
stories like people getting beat up in trains
women raped while 20 bystanders LOOK and do fucking nothing
and you're asking me for money to help women that get beat up run away?
awareness
awareness my sweet ethiopian starving ass, would they say in Mogadishu


exactly
"im aware"
yeah by now we're all aware of china raping tibet
what are we doing again?
nothing
oh yeah!
we're being "aware"

BE AWARE OF BREAST CANCER
they say
very aware
nice pink ribbon
but actually change our society so we dont consume whatever cancercausing products are out there?
nuh-uh
AWARENESS
they shout
for abused women
and the next time hillbilly jack wails on little sally in public, we're all gonna make a circle, look and do fucking nothing
afterwards we shake our heads and make an awareness commcercial
get the fuck out

[/endrant]


copy-pasted MSN rant.


fuck you.

The thing about cynicism is that it really doesn't benefit you or the others around you.
Awareness is there for you to be aware, but it's up to YOU to do something about that. And that's where the cynicism comes in, but it's really just apathy in a different form.

Mogadishu is in Somalia, btw. lol

See, that "raise awareness" is the bullshit part. So you need some attractive celebrity to be aware of this shit? Movie stars need to have exotic meals at 5 star hotels to raise funds? Give me a break! Ohhhhhhh some coke head celebrity is telling me to be strong so I should leave my abusive man!! Haaaa. No wonder she has no will to leave in the first place.

There are marketing reasons behind the video, and you can see it's been somewhat successful (three-page dialogue so far). Nonetheless, even if we see hypocrisy in these things, it shouldn't distract us from seeing the real issue at hand. It's clearly distracted you...but maybe not, if you truly believe in survival of the fittest.


Also, I'd like to add that you guys should read up on the concept of learned helplessness and hopefully make some connections.

 

[S O F I]

You can recover from that traumatizing event. You get in a car crash and are paralyzed for life? Thats something you have no control over, its total chance. Someone treats you like shit and you think that you deserve to be treated like that so you go back to it? Fuck that, thats the dumbest shit i've ever heard. Where's your sense of pride? Like salty said, its survival of the fittest.

I'm not saying I agree with domestic abuse, or abuse of any kind for that matter. What I'm saying is that if someone hits you, you stand up for yourself. If you go asking for it again, or go running back to it, I'm not gonna pity you in the least.

PS your example is rediculous or maybe I'm one of the few people who actually use their brain to think.

You have a really limited understanding of the human psyche and behavior. I mean, no offense, but there's no point in arguing with you and giving you examples if you actually haven't been exposed to this stuff elsewhere. You're not going to take it from us (we don't have that authority and also there's the ego factor) but take a psych class, a soc class, pick up a book, go to an AA meeting or something.

 

[Da_Funk]

You have a really limited understanding of the human psyche and behavior. I mean, no offense, but there's no point in arguing with you and giving you examples if you actually haven't been exposed to this stuff elsewhere. You're not going to take it from us (we don't have that authority and also there's the ego factor) but take a psych class, a soc class, pick up a book, go to an AA meeting or something.

Yeah, I really do. Since it is summer, know of any good books? (this question applies to everyone)

 

[_carmi]

You can recover from that traumatizing event. You get in a car crash and are paralyzed for life? Thats something you have no control over, its total chance. Someone treats you like shit and you think that you deserve to be treated like that so you go back to it? Fuck that, thats the dumbest shit i've ever heard. Where's your sense of pride? Like salty said, its survival of the fittest.

I'm not saying I agree with domestic abuse, or abuse of any kind for that matter. What I'm saying is that if someone hits you, you stand up for yourself. If you go asking for it again, or go running back to it, I'm not gonna pity you in the least.

PS your example is rediculous or maybe I'm one of the few people who actually use their brain to think.

My dear, you do not know anything about mental illnesses. Please I beg you to educate yourself on that matter and come back and post again afterward.

Mille grazie.

PS. Mental illnesses do not need traumatizing events to be triggered.

 

[ArtsyGirl]

I agree with SOFI with the awareness thing, the campaign is worth it if it gets some people to act.

 

[Duke]

A rep for Sofi for being the first to pick up on the Mogadishu joke


See, the thing is, though, if I encounter domestic abuse, best believe I'll poke my nose into it and try to help the person, peoples. But this whole awareness shit, FUCK THAT. It's all awareness these days, and then we're aware and we're still standing around flopping our dicks doing fucking nothing.

Awareness this awareness that, yes how about actually solving the problem?

This already goes way past the domestic abuse shit. It goes for everything these days. Help Darfur, help Tibet. T-shirts are being printed, angry liberals hold soap-box speeches.


But actually doing something about it?

Nuh-uh.

See where my cynism comes from, SOFI? The awareness bullshit is just a sweetener for society so we feel less guilty, cos God knows only 2 out of 10 people would actually DO something about it should they encounter it.


Society needs to get it's fuckin backbone back.

 

[The.Menace]

I don't want to stir something up. 2 beat a women up is not right and we don't have to discuss this - and maybe a video clip like this is good in terms of awareness. But seriously. Two women die per month and I should donate? I don't know, if you wanna donate money then go for it, but doesn't many many more people die cause of .... AIDS or starve to death in africa? I rather give my money to these people. It might not be that easy to walk way as katie mentioned on the first page, but see - it's way easier for a female in the western world to leave his man and walk away than it's for a 8 year old child in Namibia.... they truly can't walk away, aiight. And that has nothing to do with mental illness or weakness and whatever - they really really can't. And therefore I rather donate my money to those people than for this domestic violence campaign. But that's just my opinion, over all, whenever people give in order to help others, I'm all for it, that's positive and that's what this world needs - compassion.

 

[Stred]

There's no point in me contributing.
That being said..